boring diary. don't read this pt 2

this shit's harder than i thought! especially when you're broke down and hella bored and everybody else is asleep! lol. why i got such fucked up hours? well, today wouldn't have been so bad if i hadn't been such a fuckin' wino a coupla hours past midnight the night before and had to power through a nasty hangover for the rest of the day into the night. what the hell am i going to do at 2am in the morning? nothing.

not even go on myspace. *smacks forehead*

in other news, i have managed to make a complete and utter mess of my apartment not 3 days after my mom and sister have left. it has gotten so bad that i saw a COCKROACH! i'm horrible. i guess THAT is what i'll do with the rest of my waking hours. i have been in bed pretty much all day, with the exception of that impromptu pasta i made. it was aiight, by the way. i prolly wouldn't enjoyed it so much if i weren't hungover, with dry mouth from the sleeping pills, and otherwise with an empty stomach. strangely all i could think about was pizza hut. go figure. the chicken supreme, at that, with EXTRA cheese. *sigh*

so here's my action plan:

hang up coats
stow laundry
make bed
clear out desk
stow bags
wash dishes
mop floors
do laundry... wednesday. ugh.

exciting stuff, no? well i'll prolly throw in some video game time, even though i'm pretty much sick of the games i currently have. anybody know the name of the gaming version of the netflix site? maybe i'll switch over to that.

boring diary. don't read this. pt1

3:53PM

i woke up some time after 1pm. after getting off from work at midnight, New Year's Eve I took my ass home and proceeded to do absolutely nothing. i was tired, yes, but i was a tad restless, and some punk kid at work essentially ruined my day and evening. which i then subsequently took out on my boyfriend. i was wrong, and i had no business yelling at him. of course it spiraled out into him concluding that i didn't love him, and that i was a horrible boyfriend. after we hung up i drank the last half of some cheesy arbor mist bottle, a lil 50mL bottle of Johnny Walker Black, 2 bottles of Chardonnay i found in the fridge (i had to push the cork DOWNWARDS because I couldn't find a corkscrew) and 2 ambien pills.

at some point afterwards i decided to take a shower, after which i remember waking up in my NYU sweatshirt and nothing else. ah, yes. another one of my patented, world-famous blackouts. what happened? nothing i hope. i do an inventory of the apartment. there are huge red wine stains all over the kitchen floor. the fish food is knocked onto the floor. other than that, i did no damage to the apartment. what did i get from this? nothing.

i'm glad to have this excuse not to be on myspace. i won't waste a good chunk of time checking and returning messages. maybe the week will be more productive. unless my lethargy is extended into the rest of the week. in which case it wouldn't matter if i were on or not.

i feel pretty crappy though. i don't think much else is going to happen today. i'm lazy and starving, so i'm gonna huff and puff till i can't take it anymore, and then i'll stumble into the kitchen (which i've since wiped down) and try to find something to eat. i think there's some cold chicken that i can turn into a chicken salad. lots of cheese... some tomato sauce. do i have pasta? maybe i'll just make something in a pink sauce... i dunno.... whatever it is, i'll prolly binge on it, feel even more horrible, and go back to sleep. new year's day is definitely a wash.